:(

why does it matter so much to me anyway?

what's with today?

belated friday the thirteenth maybe. today had its way of making random things go wrong. from school till now. i know this sounds totally pessimistic but i can't muster up enough happy thoughts for real smiles. no matter what happens, the bad things always seem so much weightier. and the pressure. the pressure's killing me right now. other than that today seemed to be my very girly day. crying.. it just isn't my thing. worst part was, i couldn't really tell anyone. not that anyone would really alot time for me anyway. i mean, even my mom's tired from work that i guess it's a sin to even tell her things. and it's not like i have time either, because of all the school work. and i just missed a lot of things that usully make me happy, and guess what, they just had to not come today. i won't give a rundown of the sad stuff anymore. stuff like that should be written in pencil then should be erased.



hahahahah i just realized how totally self pitying and pathetic that sounded. sadness is so. overrated! hahahaha

like they say what's done is done. doesn't mean i won't learn from those things though. i love chem. why didn't i just sleep the night before?maybe i'd have remembered the things i had to and maybe i could've gotten a higher score. banban naman eh naghighest nga ko sa grammar naman (no God, i still count that as a blessing, i don't want to be ungrateful)

i'm going to work harder. i'll try to to quit being lazy. for now i want to sleep. temporary happiness. haha.

being busy has its good side. i think i'm not too selfish anymore, since being in the prom core. i mean to some extent i still am, but not like before. i hope my night goes better than i expect.

babbling is fun. because i can't babble tonight to..the people i usually babble to? haha. makes my day just perfect. that was sarcasm btw and i have to sleep now


thank you lord for all these trials because they make me me much stronger
thank you for my low scores because i won't settle for mediocrity anymore.

thank you lord for michelle and katha.

i'm so happy for both of them! hahaha finally michelle's dream is coming true! and i'm sure katha's gonna do well in everything she does from ajss to debate. sana makabreak sila. and i hope her prom date is taller than her and as good looking as she is. i also hope michelle picks the right color. haha!

i'm sorry i'm like this it's the only way i can comfort myself.

when life gives you lemons make lemonade. tonight, i have a lot of ingredients for lemonade so i have to go and make some.

and like katha said, maybe God does have a greater purpose for me. maybe this is like a chapter of a nice story. yeaaah. so i really have to go now.

miss you.